Writing Garbage

Three years ago if you had told me I’d be calling myself a writer today, I would have chuckled and said, “Right. I wish.”

Natalie Goldberg talks about writing being like a compost heap. All those journal entries, letters, emails, short stories, articles, and blog posts mingle together in their juices and every once in a while a stunning tulip pushes her way up and out of the mush. I had about 30 years of composting—mostly pure garbage–before I ever published a word.

This month on the blog, the theme is books and writing. I’ll share some guest posts from writers who have called themselves professionals much longer than I have. I’ll also have a book or two (or three) to give away to readers who love books as much as I do. Be sure to follow along on social media and share with your book-nerd and writerly friends.

I signed a book contract this February, though it won’t be published until fall of 2019, so it still feels distant and surreal. I confess I suffer from major Imposter Syndrome most days (check out a couple great podcasts by Lead Stories about that).

But I’m writing the words and adding compost to the pile, trusting something holy, hopeful, and transcendent will emerge from the heap. Before I begin writing, I pray for those who read my book—that this wouldn’t just be about me, but that we’d be together in it all. I ask the Holy Spirit for inspiration, wisdom and winsome words.

But mostly I beg God for permission to write badly. At least at first.

Julia Cameron says it like this:

“Remember that in order to recover as an artist, you must be willing to be a bad artist. Give yourself permission to be a beginner. By being willing to be a bad artist, you have a chance to be an artist, and perhaps, over time, a very good one” (The Artist’s Way, p. 30)

I pray for freedom to run my fingers over the keyboard without obsessing, over-analyzing or self-criticizing, with the reckless abandon of my naked children dancing around the living room after a bath. I need that level of confidence, self-indulgence and blind courage.

Many writers have said you can’t edit a blank page, so I’m filling the page with words and then giving myself time to wade back through the sludge. I’m hoping to find some gems buried there.

This month is about writing and books mainly because writing is at the center of my story right now. I hope this theme will somehow intersect with wherever you are in life—even if you’re not a writer. Perhaps insert whatever thing God is calling you to do that causes you the greatest amount of self-doubt or quivering-in-your-boots and relate in that way.

Now that I’m a writer, I read the Bible with new lenses. As I read Ecclesiastes recently, certain passages suddenly glowed with new meaning. Wise Solomon writes,

“He who observes the wind will not sow, and he who regards the clouds will not reap.

As you do not know the way the spirit comes to the bones in the womb of a woman with child, so you do not know the work of God who makes everything.

In the morning sow your seed, and at evening withhold not your hand, for you do not know which will prosper, this or that, or whether both alike will be good.” (Eccl. 11:5-6 ESV)

Writing demands feisty faith.

 We till, plant, and sow, then God whispers miracles from mounds of trash. He infuses bones with spirit breath and tiny seeds hidden in the ground with life. Our job is to show up, trust the Light to do its part, and keep doing the work of tilling, planting and watering. Then we sit back on our heels, and do some waiting for the tulips to grow out of our years of faithful composting.

***

This month, I hope to cover some of the following topics, so you can treat this introduction like a table of contents for the month and check back here for updated links. I probably won’t have time to do all of this, but here are some topics I *want* to cover:

My Favorite Books on Writing
Redbud Writer’s Guild vs. Hope Writers
#WOCwithpens (And a White Evangelical Woman’s Place in the Interwebs)
Interviews with Authors
What Should I Write About?
Juggling Motherhood and that Other Thing You Love to Do
Favorite Podcasts about Writing
10 Reasons You Should Start Writing
How to Start a Blog (ok, so this could be like 10 posts…help?)
Book Reviews
Summary of My Favorite Sessions at the Festival of Faith & Writing
Editing Checklist (s)

***

Our theme for April is “Books and Writing,” and I will share my favorite books, podcasts and resources for new writers.  Be sure to follow along on social media and sign up for my newsletter below so you can be alerted of new posts and free book give aways. Please get in touch at scrapingraisins (dot) gmail (dot) com if you are interested in guest posting on this topic!

Sign up for the Mid-month Digest and Secret Newsletter Here:

**Includes Amazon affiliate links

Writing Garbage: Natalie Goldberg talks about writing being like a compost heap. All those journal entries, letters, emails, short stories, articles, and blog posts mingle together in their juices and every once in a while a stunning tulip pushes her way up and out of the mush.

State of the Blog (and some exciting changes)

State of the Blog (and some exciting changes). Blogging, writing, newsletters, monthly themes, guest posters and living for Jesus.

Maybe you’re interested in social justice.

Or perhaps you’re a mom desperate to find meaning in the monotony.

Maybe life hasn’t gone as planned—God detoured your life and you are far from where you thought you’d be.

Or you’re a missionary limping from years of living overseas, trying to find your footing again as you integrate back into your home country.

Or maybe you’re a new writer, petrified, but electrified by the prospect of unleashing your words into the world.

Whoever you are, I’m honored you’re here—either by accident or by intention, my words are in your inbox, in your hands, or in front of your eyes–and I’m humbled.

I started this blog because I had some things to say about reentry, motherhood, race, writing, and living out a life of faith in practical ways. I didn’t think about “platform,” “SEO,” “branding” or “monetizing my blog.” In fact, I started it in 2012, wrote four posts, and only told my husband. But when I dusted it off and began writing again in 2015, writing felt like standing nude and exposed in a crowd. It was terrifying–and exhilarating.

I hoped for heads nodding and whispers of “yes, yes” as you read. Many of you have reached out via email, comments on the blog or on social media and let me know I wasn’t alone.

Thank you.

Some of you are new here and thinking, “So, if she doesn’t have a “brand,” then what is Scraping Raisins about?”

Good question.

What is the purpose of this blog?

If I were to distill this blog down to a single message, it would be this: How does Jesus impact our everyday lives?

And specifically:

How does Jesus sway me and you to swing to the rhythm of the Holy Spirit when culture pushes us a different direction?

How does Jesus model love and inspire us to serve family, friends, neighbors, strangers and even enemies?

How does Jesus teach us to create, live inspired lives, fight injustice, and see the sacred in the small?

And how does this all play out when it comes to our roles as mothers, fathers, husbands, wives, employees, neighbors, creators, citizens and thoughtful human beings?

You know, all the easy questions in life;-)

If these questions boil in your veins, too, then we’re sharing the right space on the internet. I look forward to learning, growing and being inspired together in 2018. Here are a few of the exciting changes I’m making this year.

Changes in Email & Blog Post Frequency

This will be the last post to come directly to your email inbox if you subscribe to my blog. I’ve decided to move to a mid-month digest and end-of-month newsletter where I’ll share what I’ve been reading, listening to and some things that are working for me. I’ll also tell about some opportunities to win free books and audio books, which will be exclusive to my newsletter subscribers. If you haven’t yet, be sure and sign up for my newsletter here if you want access to the secret content and perks of being a subscriber.

Why cut down on the frequency of emails?

I want to cultivate a relationship with you and I feel less, but more personal, email interaction will help this. I also want to write more posts without feeling embarrassed that you’re getting bombarded with multiple emails from me each week. 🙂

If you’re still interested in reading each post, then be sure and follow me on my social media channels, as I’ll be sharing posts on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and Pinterest. Otherwise, you can wait and catch up on reading posts all at once, as I’ll link to posts in the newsletters.

Changes in Content (sort of)

As a planner, I find I do better when I have a theme to write about. Because of this, I’ve chosen monthly themes to center my posts around. I may write an occasional post that is off-theme, but for the most part, the month will involve essays, interviews, guest posts, list posts, and how-to’s revolving around the monthly themes, which I’ll share at the bottom of this post.

Another big change is that I want to open up the blog to invite guest writers each month, so if you’d like to contribute, visit the “Write for Me” tab at the top of the blog (coming soon) and email me a thoughtful post or idea. I love hearing from other voices and providing a platform for new writers to share. I want to make room in my small corner of the internet for you to send your words out into the world. Welcome.

I also plan to include monthly interviews with men and women who inspire us to buck cultural norms and live Jesus-centered lives. I have several friends I want to introduce you to in the coming months.

And though I’m still resistant to having ads on my site, I’ll be pursuing affiliate partnerships with a few companies I love and don’t mind supporting in order to pay for the operational costs involved in running this site and keeping my content free for you as the reader.

So without further ado, here are the themes for this year …

2018 Themes for Scraping Raisins

 

Scraping Raisins Blog Themes

 

Sign up for the secret newsletter and/or follow me on social media to join in learning how Jesus wants to empower us wherever we are to be transformers, wonder-catchers, and seekers of the sacred in the ordinary this year.

Sign up for Mid-Month Digest & Secret Newsletter Here:

How Writers Find Their Brave

Madeleine L’Engle should be the patron saint of Christian women writers. Any time I start doubting myself, I pull out Walking on Water and feel like I can stop hyperventilating and breathe again. This morning in Walking on Water I read:

“I believe that each work of art, whether it is a work of great genius or something very small, comes to the artists and says, ‘Here I am. Enflesh me. Give birth to me.’ And the artist either says, ‘My soul doth magnify the Lord,’ and willingly becomes the bearer of the work, or refuses; but the obedient response is not necessarily a conscious one, and not everyone has the humble, courageous obedience of Mary.” (p. 18)

“When the artist is truly the servant of the work, the work is better than the artist.” (p. 24)

“When the work takes over, then the artist is enabled to get out of the way, not to interfere. When the work takes over, then the artist listens.” (p. 24)

Serve the Work. Get out of the way. Listen.

Yes.

Annie Dillard says something similar in The Writing Life:

“At its best, the sensation of writing is that of any unmerited grace. It is handed to you, but only if you look for it.” (p. 75)

Most days I sit down and write paragraphs of pure junk. It flows so easily. Then I pick back through the rubble like a hurricane victim trying to salvage valuables from the storm. A friend of mine just shared an article with me about how we must first allow the madman to write. That’s what I’m doing these days. Lots of “shitty first drafts” written by my inner madman. (Thank you, Anne Lamott, for empowering us to write what comes first.)

I have a friend who wants to start writing. “How did you get the courage to start?” she asked.

I wrote because not writing was no longer an option. It was more painful not to write than to write. Like plugging a water faucet with your finger, the words were just too pent up. They demanded a release. In Letters to a Young Poet, Rilke says that we should only write if we must.

But I am still learning how to get out of the way and serve the work. It takes a certain faith to believe in the word magic. Elizabeth Gilbert has built her entire career on it, writing Big Magic and producing a podcast called Magic Lessons. It feels like voodoo. But Christian poet Luci Shaw instead names the Holy Spirit as her muse in Breath for the Bones.

Sometimes it helps to over-spiritualize things.

When I meet other writers, they ask me if I want to write a book. “Maybe eventually,” I’ve always said. I still feel like I’m in love with the love of writing, like I’m not ready to commit to this as a profession. It is an affair without the commitment and I don’t want to sacrifice the butterflies for the long-term, daily work of love that includes the non-sexy tasks of emptying the dishwasher and hanging the wet clothes on the line. But the time has come.

The Book is asking me to write it.

I was excited at first. But lately I’ve taken cues from my children and become a fantastic whiner. Just what my husband needs.

I made the mistake of going into Barnes and Noble. Thousands of beautiful books full of billions of words assaulted me. I couldn’t leave quickly enough. They seemed to all be harassing me, screaming, “We don’t need any more of these!”

But hanging on my husband’s neck in the kitchen after the kids had finally quieted down that night, I told him about the abuse I had suffered. I echoed the books’ words: “Why? Why does the world need another book?”

“Think about it like this,” he said. “The world doesn’t need another child, either. There are billions. And yet each one is precious—unique—and a necessary and beautiful contribution to the world. And people just keep birthing them.”

This from a man who consumes over 80 books a year and reads for a living. He has narrated a few horrible books in his lifetime. Surely he would save me from myself if I was way off track.

But he believes I can do it. I don’t think I would have even started writing without him as a coach, editor and cheerleader. God knew I wouldn’t venture out without at least one person in the world telling me I could do this.

So I released my inner madman this morning. He’s running all over the page. I’m listening. I lift my hands in terrified obedience–surrender, even.

Yes. I will serve the work.

Here we go.

 

If you are a writer, how do you find your brave?

 

*Contains Amazon affiliate links

What do Annie Dillard, Madeleine L'Engle, Luci Shaw and Rilke have in common?

Why I Write (because don’t we sometimes need to remember?)

I haven’t written in five weeks. Julia Cameron would call this taking time to “restock the pond” or “refill the well.” But it has been out of necessity more than creative intention.

I painted our entire house. Alabaster White now coats the renovated popcorn ceilings and hides the dark wood trim. Sherwin Williams “Silver Strand” cools most of the walls of the house, lending a faint blue, green or grey tint depending on the lighting of the room. There is still more to do, but now that we are living here, we will have to shift furniture and barricade rooms to get it done in the evenings after the kids have gone to bed.

I also took a break from podcasts, instead painting to playlists collected from illegally downloaded music while I was living in China. But I also painted to childhood favorites like the Big Chill soundtrack including “My Girl” and “I Heard it Through the Grapevine,” as well as my Christian youth group culture beloved albums like “Enter the Worship Circle” and the album I listened to freshman year of college—Chris Rice’s “Deep Enough to Dream.”

Becoming more adept at cutting in with the angled paintbrush, I numbly eased into the music of all the women I have been. Escaping into those old identities was more comforting than obsessing over whether or not I was trading those old selves for the American Dream.

But now I have to shut off the music, put down the paint brush and get back to regular life.

I must get back to writing.

But the amount of time it takes to be a writer (not to mention a mother who writes) and live in that headspace begs the question: Why do I write at all? You may write for different reasons, but this is why I do it.

I write to think. I think best with a pen or pencil in my hand. I told a friend once that I am not a verbal processor, but need a pen to work out my thoughts. “So what is that called?” I asked her. “A writer,” she said.

I write to stay sane. (Seriously.) My journal is my personal counselor. If my husband and I reach an impasse in our communication, I’ll grab my journal and hole myself up to write it all out until I’ve figured out what I am feeling and why. I almost always reach clarity through doing this. I have saved thousands of dollars on therapy simply by journaling.

I write to remember and keep a record of my life. I have purposely not bought a fantastic camera because I want to transcribe my memories with words and not just pictures. I rode the bus in China and would experiment with different ways I could describe my experience to friends and family back home who would never have the opportunity to visit. Pictures seemed a less challenging puzzle.

I write to connect. I used to be a letter writer. I still schlep boxes of letters around with me to each place I’ve lived. Blogging, for me, sometimes feels like a polished letter to a friend. It is the state of my heart right now, in this place. But it can also feel one-sided–like standing in a lit room at night with the shades wide open. Others are seeing me from the outside, but I can’t see them. In this way, writing makes me feel exposed. Yet the days I feel most vulnerable as a writer are inevitably the days I get an email from a reader saying, “Thank you.” And “Me, too.”

I write because I am compelled. When I fell in love with my husband, love was a rapid river current that would have been impossible to escape. Writing feels much the same. Since the word “calling,” makes me squeamish, I hesitate to use that word, and yet it is something like that. I’m committed, but I also can’t imagine not writing. Being trapped without a way of getting my thoughts out seems like the worst kind of punishment. Writing is a need, not a want.

And to spiritualize it all (because sometimes we need to do that, don’t we?), I write my life as an offering. I hope God will take my loaves and fish—the simplicity of my days—and use them to feed more than just myself. Writing demands faith because there is always the fear that I am just wasting my time and adding noise to the world. But God delights in creating banquets out of table scraps, abundance out of scarcity, and cool springs from parched land.

I trust that the God who makes tiny seeds grow from dirt can plant my word offerings in the world and cultivate beauty that wasn’t there before.

And so this week I return to work without pay, fame or fanfare. For all its impossible demands on my time and attention, not writing is a far worse torture.

 

If you are a writer, why do you write?

 

**Contains Amazon affiliate links

Why I Write

Ten Writing Tips from The 10 Minute Writer’s Workshop Podcast

Recently I’ve been binge-listening to the NPR podcast The 10 Minute Writer’s Workshop. In it, the host, Virginia Prescott, interviews famous writers about their writing process. She begins each podcast with the question, “Which is harder to write—the first sentence or the last?” Many of the writers chuckle and answer, “the middle!”

Here are some of my biggest takeaways from the hours I’ve spent listening to these talented writers over the past couple weeks:

1. The best way to become a better writer is to be a prolific reader.

2. The other way to get better at writing is to write. There are no shortcuts to sitting in your chair and doing the work.

3. The worst thing new writers do is give up.

4. You have to find what works for you when it comes to daily rituals (though most wake up very early in the morning to write).

5. Every writer said the final product is usually far different from the first draft. They spend a lot of time editing and revising their work. It’s okay to write a shitty first draft (as Anne Lamott talks about).

6. Don’t just write what you know (like so many people advise).

7. Sometimes saying something simply is the best way to say it.

8. When they are stuck, they mix up the routine:  go for a walk, change locations or switch from a computer to free-writing in a journal.

9. At least five writers mentioned Anne Lamott’s book Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life as a book for writers to read. Other books mentioned more than once were The Writing Life by Annie Dillard and On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft by Stephen King. (I’ve read them all and agree!)

10. Many writers expressed that the work takes on a mind of its own and that they are simply a conduit for the words to get themselves onto the page and out into the world.

 

If you are a writer, teacher or student of writing, I would highly recommend this podcast for ideas on finding your writing flow. Each time I listen, I walk away encouraged and more motivated to share my words with the world.

What’s the best writing advice you’ve ever received? Which of these tips most resonates with you at this stage of your writing career?

Check out this podcast to hear quick, fascinating interviews with some of these writers: Salman Rushdie, Alexander McCall Smith, Anita Shreve, Patti Smith, James McBride, Joe Hill, Judy Blume, Jodi Picoult, Colson Whitehead, Krista Tippett and many others!

 

**Contains Amazon affiliate links

If you are a writer, teacher or student of writing, I would highly recommend this podcast for ideas on finding your own writing flow.

When Writing Feels Like a Waste of Time {for SheLoves}

On a rough day, my husband will cheer me up with a dozen yellow roses. For some reason, it’s often before we go out of town, so I immediately think how we will receive a sad, wilted welcome when we return from our trip. It feels like a waste of beauty.

How many days and months go into cultivating a single yellow rose? Daily sunlight, water and fertilizer encourage it to grow. At just the right moment, it is snipped, sold and carried from the store by some well-meaning suitor or lover (or more likely, a female who treats herself to this little luxury every once in a while). All for what? To sit on our crumb-laden kitchen tables for a few days, splashing our rooms with color and assaulting our senses with scent only to be thrown in the trash within the week?

Sometimes this is how publishing a piece of writing feels. When I think about the days, months and years that have preceded putting my thoughts into words, then the hours of molding and shaping them, coaxing out the beauty, the grace, the deeper meaning, it reminds me of these roses. I am the gardener and yet I also decide when my words are ready to be cut and offered to the world. When my offering of words is welcomed, I smile. And yet how quickly the glory fades as my article is overlapped by another, then another, then another article until what felt like vibrant, fresh and life-breathing words become faded and forgotten.

So is writing (without monetary compensation) even worth it?

***

Last night I tried out a complicated new recipe. I sipped red wine, dancing between the recipe on my computer screen and turning up the volume of the “evening acoustic” album on Pandora. My husband wrestled with the kids on the rug in the living room while I chopped onions, garlic and peppers to toss into the simmering oil in the pan. He took the kids out for a dusk walk and I relaxed into the smells, sounds and feel of a kitchen in use. When they returned, we washed tiny hands, strapped kids into high chairs and bowed heads to pray in spite of spoons banging and feet kicking.

If you’re a parent, then you know what came after this seemingly magical moment.

“Yuck,” my son said, pushing his dish away. My daughter picked out a few pieces of food, but also declared my meticulously prepared meal “yucky.” My husband and I finished eating in less than 15 minutes and just like that—after nearly an hour of preparation–it was over.

But here’s the thing. Even though the food was underappreciated, consumed quickly and the process will need to be repeated tomorrow and the next day, it was still worth it. Why?

Because the process of preparation fed my soul. The meal gave us a reason to sit down together as a family. And it provided nourishment for the hungry ones at the table.

Just like your writing.

As you write, God is working out what He is working in you...

Continue reading at SheLoves.

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